Ugh...

When am I going to quit smoking? I heard a rumor about this guy that said something about this other dude, but that wasn't totally true. I wish I could challenge the world's first taboo and try infant open heart surgery like Dr. Blalock did. I wouldn't make my assistant hide behind the ferns at the dinner of my honor. Dr. Blalock did that. What a jerk. If I'm not careful, I'll wind up on that operating table. The world doesn't know that I still have a baby heart. Now, if I had a mustache that would be one thing. If I had a mustache that would be just about everything. I'm not asking for a Sellek or an Elliott, but I need a friggin' bone here... I mean, what am I bringing to the table? I've got a Chester, a freakin' Chester the Molester. "Where'd you park the van?" is basically what the thin, weasley tuft screams underneath my nostrils. Anyway, I dunno. When am I going to quit smoking?